Many people are surprised to learn that ongoing emotional stress within a relationship can affect both physical and mental health. Research shows that experiences such as emotional abuse, chronic relationship stress, and unhealthy relationship patterns can have a significant impact on overall well-being (Lohmann et al., 2024).
While every relationship is different, some people experience patterns such as ongoing criticism, gaslighting, manipulation, controlling behaviors, emotional invalidation, chronic conflict, the silent treatment, or feeling like they are constantly “walking on eggshells.” Over time, these experiences can take a toll on both the mind and body.
Effects of Unhealthy Relationship Patterns on Your Body
When someone experiences ongoing emotional stress, the body’s natural stress response—often called the “fight-or-flight” response—can remain activated for long periods of time. When this happens, it can affect sleep, energy levels, emotional well-being, and physical health.
Some people experiencing emotionally unhealthy relationship dynamics may notice symptoms such as:
- Trouble sleeping
- Fatigue or low energy
- Frequent illness
- Difficulty managing emotions
- Headaches
- Muscle or back pain
Research has also found that gastrointestinal (GI) concerns and chronic pain are common among people experiencing ongoing relationship stress and emotional abuse (Muchemwa et al., 2025). In some cases, these physical symptoms persist even when medical testing does not identify a clear physical cause.
These findings remind us that unhealthy emotional experiences in relationships can have very real effects on the body.
Effects of Unhealthy Relationship Patterns on Your Mental Health
Unhealthy relationship patterns can also have a significant impact on emotional well-being. When someone experiences ongoing criticism, manipulation, emotional invalidation, or feels like they are constantly walking on eggshells, they may begin to feel anxious, overwhelmed, emotionally exhausted, or unsure of themselves.
Over time, these experiences can contribute to symptoms such as:
- Anxiety or increased worry
- Low self-esteem or self-doubt
- Difficulty trusting yourself or others
- Feeling emotionally drained or overwhelmed
- Irritability or difficulty managing emotions
- Sadness or feelings of loneliness
- Difficulty setting or maintaining healthy boundaries
Some people may also find themselves questioning their own perceptions or wondering if they are “overreacting” to what is happening in the relationship. This can be especially common when someone has experienced gaslighting or repeated emotional invalidation.
When these patterns continue over time, they can affect a person’s sense of safety, confidence, and overall well-being. Therapy can provide a supportive space to better understand these patterns, process difficult experiences, and begin developing healthier ways of relating to yourself and others.
Healing After Unhealthy Relationship Experiences
Healing is possible, and recovery often involves caring for both the mind and body. Evidence-based treatment approaches offered at FamilyFirst in Vienna, VA may include:
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
- Trauma-informed therapy
- Somatic or body-based therapies
- Sleep and stress restoration strategies
- Support in rebuilding healthy boundaries, confidence, and a greater sense of safety
For many people, creating distance from an emotionally unhealthy relationship can reduce stress-related symptoms and provide space for healing. Some notice improvements in sleep, anxiety, physical tension, and overall well-being as they move toward healthier relationships. Others benefit from working with a therapist to process their experiences, strengthen coping skills, and rebuild trust in themselves and others.
Understanding the connection between your relationship experiences and your physical and mental health is often an important first step, and with the right support, recovery is possible.
Stephanie M. Heese
Practice Manager, Clinical Mental Health Counseling Grad Student
About the Author:
Stephanie Heese is the Practice Manager at FamilyFirst Psychological Services, a mental health practice serving the Vienna, VA area, where she supports clinical operations and client care. She holds a bachelor’s degree in psychology with concentrations in clinical psychology and health psychology from George Mason University, where she graduated with honors. She is currently pursuing her master’s degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Wake Forest University and is working toward becoming a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC).
As she continues her clinical training, Stephanie’s areas of interest include anxiety, unhealthy relationship patterns, working with couples, women’s mental health, and life transitions such as parenthood, career and relationship changes, and empty nesting. She is also interested in supporting teens and young adults navigating educational and college challenges, parenting concerns, and individuals caring for chronically ill loved ones.
References:
Day, N. J. S., Townsend, M. L., & Grenyer, B. F. S. (2021).
Pathological narcissism: An analysis of interpersonal dysfunction within intimate relationships. Personality and Mental Health, 16(3), 204–216.
Lohmann, S., Cowlishaw, S., Ney, L., O’Donnell, M., & Felmingham, K. (2024).
The trauma and mental health impacts of coercive control: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse, 25(1), 630–647.
