How to Haul Ourselves Out‬ of Thinking Traps

One‬ of‬ the‬ major‬ principles‬ of‬ Cognitive‬ Behavioral‬ Therapy‬ (CBT)‬ is‬ that‬ so-called‬ cognitive‬ distortions‬ bring‬ us‬ a‬ lot‬ of‬ unnecessary‬ misery.‬ Cognitive‬ distortions‬ are‬ also‬ known‬ as‬ thinking‬ errors,‬ thinking‬ traps,‬ or‬ as‬ therapist‬ David‬ Pratt‬ has nicknamed‬ them,‬ “stinking‬ thinking.”‬‬ Thinking traps are‬ misperceptions‬ and‬ failures‬ of‬ logic‬ that‬ leave‬ us‬ feeling‬ angry,‬ frustrated,‬ ashamed,‬ embarrassed,‬ anxious,‬ or‬ disappointed.‬ 

Common thinking errors include:‬

  1. All-or-nothing‬ thinking‬.‬ Thinking that something‬ is‬ either‬ all‬ good,‬ or‬ all‬ bad.‬ Example:‬ a‬ student‬ deems‬ her‬ report‬ card‬ a‬ complete‬ failure‬ because‬ one‬ B+‬ negates‬ all the‬ other A’s.‬
  2. Overgeneralization‬.‬ Taking‬ an‬ isolated‬ incident‬ and‬ using‬ it‬ to‬ make‬ a‬ broad, and‬ usually‬ negative, generalization.‬ Example:‬ “I‬ got‬ one‬ thumbs-down‬ on my social media post. Everyone is against me.”‬
  3. Catastrophizing‬.‬ Thinking‬ that‬ when‬ one‬ little‬ thing‬ goes‬ wrong,‬ it’s‬ the‬ end‬ of‬ the‬ world.‬ Example:‬ A‬ wonderful‬ party‬ with‬ delicious‬ food‬ and‬ drinks,‬ festive‬ ambience,‬ and‬ lots‬ of‬ opportunities‬ for‬ people‬ to‬ make‬ real‬ connections‬ becomes‬ a total fiasco in the host’s mind because their souffle fell.‬
  4. Disqualifying‬ the‬ positive‬.‬ Discounting‬ any‬ positive‬ input‬ that‬ conflicts‬ with‬ one’s‬ negative‬ view‬ of‬ oneself‬ or‬ of‬ a‬ situation.‬ This‬ is‬ frequently‬ seen‬ when‬ we‬ try‬ to‬ disprove‬ compliments‬ we‬ receive.‬ Example:‬ if‬ someone‬ compliments‬ my‬ outfit, I reply with, “No, it’s really wrinkled” instead of simply saying, “Thank you.”‬
  5. Fortune‬ telling‬.‬ Predicting‬ the‬ outcome‬ of‬ a‬ situation‬ before‬ it‬ happens.‬ Example: “I’m going to bomb my audition.”‬
  6. Emotional‬ reasoning‬.‬ Making‬ decisions‬ based‬ on‬ feelings‬ alone,‬ without‬ considering‬ objective‬ reality.‬ Example:‬ “That‬ woman‬ looks‬ a‬ bit‬ like‬ my‬ evil‬ ex-mother-in-law, so she must be a terrible person.”‬
  7. Mind-reading‬.‬ Being‬ certain‬ that‬ you‬ know‬ what‬ someone‬ else‬ is‬ thinking‬ without‬ confirming‬ it.‬ Example:‬ “He‬ didn’t‬ say‬ hi‬ to‬ me‬ in‬ the‬ hall‬ today,‬ so‬ he‬ must be mad at me.”‬

If‬ we‬ could‬ correct‬ these‬ thinking‬ errors,‬ we‬ would‬ feel‬ better,‬ but‬ it’s‬ tough:‬ once‬ emotion‬ takes‬ over,‬ it’s‬ hard to get the logical brain back online to set ourselves straight.‬ So‬ how‬ do‬ we‬ haul‬ ourselves‬ out‬ of‬ these‬ thinking‬ traps,‬ or‬ avoid‬ tumbling‬ into‬ them‬ in‬ the first place?‬

  1. Awareness‬.‬ Being‬ aware‬ that‬ we‬ sometimes‬ experience‬ these‬ cognitive‬ distortions is the first step to combatting them.‬
  2. Pausing‬.‬ When‬ we‬ find‬ ourselves‬ thinking‬ negatively‬ about‬ something,‬ pause‬ for‬ a‬ quick‬ timeout.‬ Take‬ a‬ few‬ breaths‬ then‬ ask yourself,‬ “Is‬ there‬ another‬ way‬ to‬ think about this?” or “What might a different perspective be?”‬
  3. The‬ “would-I-ever-say-this-to-a-friend?”‬ test‬.‬ If‬ a‬ friend‬ came‬ to‬ you‬ with‬ a‬ cognitive‬ distortion,‬ would‬ you‬ say,‬ “Yeah,‬ you’re‬ right,‬ your‬ party‬ was‬ a‬ total‬ disaster,”‬ or‬ would‬ you put‬ forth‬ a‬ less‬ damning‬ judgment,‬ such‬ as,‬ “Yeah,‬ too‬ bad‬ about‬ your‬ souffle,‬ but‬ your‬ guests‬ told‬ me‬ how‬ much‬ they‬ enjoyed‬ the‬ other‬ 15‬ dishes you prepared.”

Bottom‬ line:‬ Just‬ because‬ you‬ think‬ it‬ doesn’t‬ make‬ it‬ true‬.‬ Do‬ some‬ fact-checking‬ on yourself before you assume the worst!‬

Sarah Ince, LCSW
Licensed Clinical Social Worker