Part 2: Distress Tolerance–Let’s Not Make It Any Worse

In Part 1 of our Distress Tolerance blog series, I explained why each and every one of us needs distress tolerance skills and I offered suggestions for implementing a set of strategies called T.I.P.P.  In this blog, I share two additional distress tolerance strategies for you to add to your coping toolbox.  Just like T.I.P.P., self-soothing and ACCEPTS skills are intended to get us through difficult emotional situations one moment at a time.

Distress Tolerance Strategy #2:  Self-Soothe

Think of soothing each of your five senses.

  • Vision: Look for a beautiful sunrise or sunset, the stars at night, or pictures of these things. Look for beautiful photos of beaches or mountains or a beautiful flower. Look to nature all around you.
  • Hearing: Listen to music you enjoy. Listen for the breeze, or the trees in the breeze. Listen for birds or waves of the water.
  • Smell: Find a fragrance you enjoy, and smell fragrances around you. Smell a flower, or perfume, freshly cut grass, or burning wood in a fireplace.
  • Taste: Enjoy some of your favorite foods.
  • Touch: Apply moisturizer. Take a hot shower, or a long bath. Sit in the sun or shade and feel the warmth or cool of the breeze.
  • Movement: If you want to change your mood, move. Go for a walk or run, dance, stretch, etc.

Distress Tolerance Strategy #3:  ACCEPTS skills

When you are feeling uncomfortable, upset, or distressed about something, pick one (or several) of the ACCEPTS skills to engage in.

  • Activities:  Engage in an activity, focus attention on a task you need to get done.
  • Contributions: Do something for someone else
  • Comparisons:  Juxtapose or Compare how you are feeling now to a time when you felt different. Compare yourself to those less fortunate. Watch reality shows about others’ troubles; read about disasters, others’ suffering.
  • Emotions: Generate different emotions than the ones that you’re feeling
  • Pushing Away: Push the situation away by leaving it for a while. Leave the situation mentally. Build an imaginary wall between yourself and the situation. Block thoughts and images from your mind. Put the pain on a shelf. Box it up and put it away for a while. 
  • Thoughts: Engage in thoughts that compete with the ones present during the crisis. Count to 10; count colors in a painting or poster or out the window; count anything. Repeat words to a song in your mind. Do puzzles. Watch TV or read.
  • Sensations: Use your senses to ground yourself. Squeeze a rubber ball very hard. Listen to loud music. Hold ice in your hand or mouth. Go out in the rain or snow. Take a hot or cold shower.

It may be helpful to keep these strategies for tolerating distress somewhere nearby (e.g., post on the refrigerator, leave on your desk, put in the notes section of your phone) so that they can be useful to you and/or your family members the next time an uncomfortable situation or emotion arises.  

Celes Smith

Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW)

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