I have seen an increasing number of children and teens with social anxiety over the last few years. Although it is a common issue, it can be challenging to manage. Let’s talk about what social anxiety is and what you as parents can do to help.

Social anxiety is a fear of social situations in which a person worries they might be judged, embarrassed, or humiliated. For children and teens, this might mean feeling extremely nervous about speaking in class, meeting new people, or even attending social events. It’s more than just being shy; it’s a fear that can affect daily life.

Signs of Social Anxiety
1.Avoidance of Social Situations: Those with social anxiety might avoid situations where they feel they could be judged or embarrassed. This can include skipping school, avoiding parties, or not participating in class discussions.
2. Physical Symptoms: These can include sweating, shaking, a racing heart, or
stomachaches when faced with social situations.
3. Excessive Worry: They might worry for days or weeks before (and after) a social event and often expect the worst to happen.
4. Low Self-Esteem: Those with social anxiety may feel self-conscious and have a negative view of themselves.

How Parents Can Help
1. Open Communication: Encourage your child to talk about their feelings. Listen without judgment and validate their experiences. Let them know it is okay to feel anxious and that you are there to support them.
2. Educate and Normalize: Help your child understand that social anxiety is common and that they are not alone. Sometimes, just knowing that others feel the same way can be comforting.
3. Encourage Gradual Exposure: Help your child gradually face their fears. Start with small, less intimidating situations and slowly work up to more challenging ones. This can build their confidence over time.
4. Teach Coping Strategies: Deep breathing, positive self-talk, and visualization
techniques can help children manage their anxiety in the moment. Encourage them to practice these skills regularly.
5. Model Confident Behavior: As parents, your behavior can set an example. Show confidence in social situations and demonstrate healthy coping strategies.
6. Encourage Social Connection: Encourage your child to join clubs or activities that interest them. This can provide a more comfortable setting to make friends and improve their social skills.
7. Seek Professional Help: If social anxiety is significantly impacting your child’s life, consider seeking help from a mental health professional. Therapy, especially cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), can be very effective in treating social anxiety.

Social anxiety in teens can be challenging, but it can be managed. As parents, your
encouragement, patience, and support are vital. Together, you can help your teen navigate social situations and build the confidence they need to thrive. Remember: the goal is not to eliminate anxiety but to help them manage it so they can participate in life more fully.

Kelly Theis, Ph.D.
Licensed Clinical Psychologist