For some children, it is more than just back-to-school time…it’s time to adjust to a whole new school! Whether your family recently relocated or your child is moving on to middle school or high school, starting a new school can be stressful. Below you will find 5 tips for helping your child adjust to a new school:
1) Provide opportunities for exposure to the new school. Take advantage of school open houses, tour the school, and meet the principal and other school staff. If possible, introduce your child to other students who will be attending the school and take advantage of a “buddy system” if the school offers one. Right before school starts, your child may benefit from a “trial run” that includes practicing the morning routine, including going to the bus stop/drop-off point and taking a walk to the new classroom(s). Make sure your child is familiar with the school schedule (including hours, class locations, etc.) and their routines for lunch and transportation.
2) Prepare your child for making new friends. Provide your child with a brief review of important social skills for creating new friendships, such as smiling, asking questions, identifying a shared interest, and getting involved in clubs/teams. Parents, too, can be an excellent resource for helping children meet new friends. You can arrange playdates, get your child involved in summer activities in the neighborhood, throw a cookout for families in the neighborhood, and start conversations with other parents at local playgrounds, libraries, etc.
3) Offer encouragement and support. Children may need additional “talk time” prior to and during the transition. Be available to hear their concerns, help them focus on the positive, and talk with them about what the change might be like. It may be helpful to talk with your child about successes he/she has had in dealing with transitions in the past and to remind him/her about previous positive experiences in making friends and meeting new people.
4) Get involved with the school. Children often feel comforted by their parents’ presence in school. Introduce yourself to your child’s teacher and maintain frequent communication. Get to know the school staff and visit often. If you have time, sign up to volunteer in the classroom and/or get involved with the PTA.
5) Read! Many books have been written for children of all ages about adjusting to a new school. Reading about issues children may face and/or hearing about how others have handled a similar transition can ease your child’s anxiety. Several recommended books include: “Ruby and the Booker Boys #1: Brand New School, Brave New Ruby”, “My New School”, “New Bear at School”, “First Day Jitters”, and “How to Be A Friend: A Guide To Making Friends and Keeping Them”.
Kelly H. Theis, Ph.D.
Licensed Clinical Psychologist